We're in This Together

Received a package in the mail today with this video on a dvd along with a really cool messenger style bag with the words, "We're in This Together" written on the side of it. I shared my song with an amazing organization called Christian Horizons for them to use on their promo media. They even decided to use "we're in this together" as their slogan for 2010. Needless to say I'm honoured. I feel as though I've taken part in something meaningful. That's a great feeling.

Take one for the kids?

Earlier this week I received an email from my dad with a subject line that read: "Take one for the kids?" If you know my dad, you know he's always got something up his sleeve. Apparently this Christmas season is no exception. If you've never been over to the Acts of Kindness site - please check out his blog here.

For the last several years my mom, dad, and sisters have become increasingly involved in social justice - specifically helping the orphans and widows of Central Asia (Uzbekistan and Kyrgystan). Their lives have become an embodiment of James 1:27...

Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world (ESV).

Creativity and the refusal to give up has characterized the pure religion that I have witnessed in the ministry of my family. I'm so proud of them, and this Christmas I'm going to get involved - and so are you - you just don't know it yet.

Here's the email I received from my dad:

I don't know if you saw my recent blog post www.actofkindness.blogspot.com. Go take a look... I was hoping that you might be interested. I am looking for people from all over North America that would put a challenge to their friends and co workers... the challenge is this ... they raise $500 for Christmas in Central Asia, and you let some one throw a pie in your face. You can choose who... maybe a friend, maybe the highest donor, or maybe draw from everyone that made a donation... Any donations over $10 we will give a tax receipt if they would like one. I will also set up a paypal button on the blog that people can donate on line. I will then keep every one updated on your on line donations... when the challenge is complete, photograph the event, and send it to me and I will post them all on line....

The challenge will start Monday the 9th of November and finish on the 23rd of November. You may even know of others that would like to take the pie challenge as well.. if you do , just let me know. For everyone that is interested, I will send out a pledge form. This can be a lot of fun, and help a lot of kids while we are at it.

Thanks,

John

I will gladly take one - a pie, that is - for the kids in Central Asia this season. So, whether you celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah, Festivus, or Kwanzaa I'm hoping you'll get involved. I'll keep you posted as to how you can donate toward this worthy cause - I know for sure it will involve Pay Pal through my dad's site. Furthermore, if YOU want to get involved and take one for the kids, you CAN. Email me at bjbwright@gmail.com and I will get you the information you need. Remember to check actofkindness.blogspot.com for updates and more details.

My dad has set his hopes really high for donations this year. You can read all about last year's pie-in-the-face project on his blog, but here's a few lines about where this money - your money - is going:

Over $2000 was raised and over 400 children experienced a day they will never forget.... and lets face it , we all had a little fun, and felt good about it. Our original goal was $1000 to bring 100 kids to the the circus and out for supper... we surpassed that goal and we were able to bring Christmas to nearly 300 more kids that for one reason or another we could not take out of the orphanage. They were treated to a Christmas concert (put on by kids from another orphanage) as well as presents and treats...

This year I have a vision.. or a simple dream if you will.... What if many of you got involved and "Took one for the Kids"... We will make this challenge $500... You let me know you will be stepping up and be willing to receive a pie in the face, and I will set up a pay pal button to keep track of sponsors on line... then as the targets are met , you take the photo's of the event, and forward them to me, and I will post them here...

I hope you'll catch the vision and get involved.

Christ's peace,

BENWRIGHT

A New Metaphor and Two Consolations: EASING THE SYMPTOMS OF IDENTITY CRISIS AND ROLE CONFUSION IN THE FIRST YEARS OF PASTORAL MINISTRY

DISCLAIMER

This post is significantly longer than the usual stuff that gets posted here. I thought I would share this paper that I'm turning in for my Leadership Development class tomorrow. It's a reflective leadership essay that is supposed to integrate autobiographical musings with concepts gleaned from the course readings. So, if you're not into that kind of stuff, simply skip down to the next post. But if you are into that kind of stuff, grab a cup of tea and enjoy...

In April of this year my wife, Rachel, and I took part in a two-day school of ministry attended by about a dozen other ordinands who had come with their families to fulfill this mandatory requirement of the credential process while enjoying a complimentary all-inclusive night’s stay in a hotel. The agenda for this mid-week conference included seminars on marriage enrichment, managing personal finances, spirituality, and preaching skills. The time spent in the seminar room was augmented by free time in the evenings where young pastors-in-training and their spouses (and some children) enjoyed fellowship around the table and the poolside. As I evaluate the effectiveness of this pre-ordination retreat it is clear that one important component was missing: there was no seminar that came close to addressing the weight of anxiety and identity crisis that I would experience in the months following the retreat and preceding the date of my actual ordination ceremony - September 13, 2009.

This reflective essay seeks to address the role confusion I have experienced over the last year of my ministry. In addition to this autobiographical element I will integrate three important concepts from Leadership Development (LEAD 0510) that have contributed to an increasingly balanced concept of my identity as an ordained Christian minister. The first concept comes from Joseph C. Rost’s Leadership for the Twenty-First Century. In his chapter on “The Problem of Leadership Studies” Rost makes clear that confusion as to the nature of leadership is a widespread predicament. The second concept arises out of Henri Nouwen’s In the Name of Jesus: Reflections on Christian Leadership. Reading this book served as my introduction to the work of Nouwen, a reading relationship that I hope to continue in the years ahead. One final concept that has greatly alleviated the stress created by role confusion surrounding my placement within the Christian community is Dr Arthur Boers’ essay, “The Pastor as Spiritual Orienteer.”

In St Paul’s first epistle to the church at Corinth he consoled them with these words: “No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man” (1 Corinthians 10:13 ESV). There are times in our lives when we feel like the only person on the face of the earth who is going through a particular crisis. Paul’s words to the Corinthians, however, remind us that there is a solidarity that exists amongst humankind that relates directly to the comparability of the crises that we experience. Joseph Rost, author of the influential book Leadership for the Twenty-First Century argues that one crisis that is “common to man” is the problem of defining leadership. Rost notes three fundamental problems with leadership studies, all of which contribute to the ignorance and doubt that surrounds the many unfortunate mis-definitions of leadership:

(i.) Writers on leadership have placed a misguided emphasis on (a) what is peripheral to the nature of leadership and (b) what is more the ‘content’ of leadership, as opposed to leadership’s true nature (Rost 3)

(ii.) The effort to define leadership put forward by these writers, along with other scholars and leadership practitioners, has resulted in epic and manifold failure (6).

(iii.) Confusion amongst leadership scholars and practitioners has resulted in the lack of a school of leadership that would be responsible for framing an adequate understanding of leadership (9).

If Rost is correct in his identification of these problems of leadership studies, and I believe he is, that would explain why I am unable to label leadership correctly when I see it happening, much less when I engage in it (6). Is it any wonder, therefore, that a young ordinand such as myself would suffer from identity crisis as an emerging leader? Leadership, while coming to “mean all things to all people,” had completely lost its meaning to me (7). Yet, somehow coming to recognize the universality of my problem helped me to realize that hope still existed for this frustrating situation. Like Rost, however, I am not satisfied with merely acknowledging the fact that a swampy miasma surrounds a multidisciplinary definition of leadership. Obviously, an exhaustive definition of leadership is beyond the scope of this paper. However, the following sections of this reflective essay will interact with two concepts of leadership that have positively impacted my understanding of what leadership means in my present context of local church ministry.

As mentioned above, In the Name of Jesus and the leadership insights contained therein served as my introduction to the writing ministry and soul of Henri Nouwen. The brevity of this essay prevents the kind of appraisal that In the Name of Jesus deserves. Instead, I will focus on just one concept from Nouwen’s reflections on Christian leadership.

Part of the identity crisis that I suffered in the months leading up to my ordination came as a result of not fully understanding that “ministry is a communal and mutual experience” (Nouwen 57). Somewhere along the way I fell prey to the “it’s lonely at the top” misconception that places unnecessary space between clergy and congregation. My first years of ministry have been spent wondering just how involved to get in the lives of the people I am ministering to. Nouwen would suggest that framing the problem in those terms is actually part of the problem, since, as pastors we are called to

feed his sheep and care for them, not as “professionals” who know their clients’ problems and take care of them, but as vulnerable brothers and sisters who know and are known, who care and are cared for, who forgive and are being forgiven, who love and are being loved (61).

Ministry as a mutual experience seems much more sensible, natural, and scriptural then the “keep an emotional distance at all costs” model that I have been unsuspectingly influenced by in my first years of ministry. What Nouwen has offered me is a new starting point through which to interpret the pastor-congregant relationship:

Somehow we have come to believe that good leadership requires a safe distance from those we are called to lead…But how can we lay down our life for those with whom we are not even allowed to enter into a deep personal relationship? Laying down your life means making your own faith and doubt, hope and despair, joy and sadness, courage and fear available to others as ways of getting in touch with the Lord of life (61).

Clearly, this approach involves a degree of risk. But the risk of authenticity for the sake of meaningful relationships not only outweighs being lonely at the top, it is also another step in the right direction to clarifying the identity of the leader and the nature of leadership.

A third and final concept that has alleviated the anxiety created by role confusion surrounding my placement as a young leader within the Christian community is Dr Arthur Boers’ essay, “The Pastor as Spiritual Orienteer.” This paper was published as the twelfth chapter in The Heart of the Matter: Pastoral Ministry in Anabaptist Perspective (Ed. Erick Sawatzky 2004). My identity crisis as an emerging leader was caused, at least in part, by the lack of a sufficient metaphor that would serve to explain my role and function as a pastor. Boers provides such a metaphor: the pastor as spiritual orienteer. Admittedly, I have not done much formal orienteering (i.e., hiking through the woods with a map and compass), but my love for nature and general (albeit limited) knowledge of the sport increased the personal relevance of this metaphor. Boers observes that, “God’s people continually need to remember and be reoriented, that is, to repent” (171). He envisions the pastor’s role as a spiritual orienteer who points and directs the community’s attention to God (172).

On Sundays, in many different ways, we test our directions against the direction of God’s reign. We see the need to readjust. Then God’s reality and priorities inform us throughout the week, both in mundane life and in crises. We need ongoing orientation and reorientation in this hard work (171).

The nature of the pastor’s work is to fulfill this role of spiritual orienteer. This metaphor integrates smoothly with Nouwen’s idea of ministry as a mutual endeavor, since “the pastor as spiritual orienteer is also on the journey and also needs constant orientation and reorientation (172). This constant pastoral reorientation comes by way of “the compass and map of Scriptures, prayer, accountability, community, formation, and worship” (172).

The symptoms of leadership identity crisis and subsequent role confusion have been eased by a new metaphor and two consolations. The pastor as spiritual orienteer, combined with Nouwen’s advice on clergy-laity interrelations and Rost’s dissatisfaction with contemporary leadership studies have been three meaningful contributions to a clearer understanding of my identity and role as an ordained pastor in these first years of ministry. I look forward to many years of meaningful ministry, in whatever form the Lord wills, and for many more clarifications of my understanding of his call on my life.

Ignorance, make room for serendipity: The Swell Season and Emo-Kryptonite

One of my inaugural blog posts on this site had to do with the movie Once and the positive impact it had on my life, music, and general inspiration level. If you get nostalgic and want to read it again, just click here. How presumptuous of me; perhaps you haven’t read it yet. First-timer’s should click here instead. (It’s the same link, gotchya!).

The beauty of the Once story exists mainly in the music. And the beauty of the music lies mainly in the souls of Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova, or, as they have come to be known, The Swell Season. Since the first time I watched Once I knew I needed the soundtrack. And I guess I’ve been so busy listening to those songs that I never bothered to check whether or not The Swell Season was working on a follow-up project.

Ignorance, make room for serendipity. Just last week I got to the front of the lineup at the 401-Stevenson Starbucks and much to my surprise and delight I saw this…

Cool album cover, eh? Yes, you can judge this album by the cover. It’s perfect. Glen and Marketa have mastered the whole guy-girl-singing-in-harmony-but-managing-not-to-sound-corny song and dance. I’m not going to lie - this sub-genre is my emo-kryptonite. There’s something about tight guy-girl harmonies that gets me weak in the knees.

Somehow, listening to this new offering by the Swell Season (the album title is, “Strict Joy”) makes me feel like I’m watching the next chapter of the Once story unfold in realtime. I don't really have a rating system for evaluating stuff I like, so I'll just give it a "smile."

"Leading a congregation in worship was my cross to bear."

Ever have a conversation with someone that seems so providential it’s almost surreal?

I had one such conversation the other night at Starbucks. I get a lot of school work done at Starbucks, and we have three to choose from here in Oshawa. The newest one is out on Stevenson Rd and the 401 HWY. It’s not my favourite, but I go there because three months after they opened the talking heads at Starbuck’s head office were threatening to close it because it wasn’t meeting the projected goals that had been set. So, I usually take my business there for ethical reasons - to help out the little guy.

At any rate, earlier this week I ended up at the Starbucks inside Chapters (which, by the way, is such a genius partnership - another blog). I spent about two hours reading Joseph C. Rost’s Leadership for the Twenty-First Century and sipping an extra hot skinny vanilla latté. Just as I was fixing to leave, an older gentleman (probably about 75 years old) who I had been watching read one of those free newspapers (which is code for taking a nap) got up and approached me. He pointed at my bible (a hardcover NRSV) and said, “You know something, I come and sit here all the time, and I never see anyone browsing the religion section or reading their bible. Do you mind talking about your faith?”

At first he didn’t want to talk about church or denominations - just the faith he had in Jesus. Interestingly enough, however, after he found out that I come from the pentecostal tradition he was more than happy to place himself within the small bubble that some refer to as the Pentecostal Assemblies of Canada. When I told him that I attended Evangel he immediately made the connection with the Bombay’s and went on to tell me that he actually boarded with R.E. Sternall as a young man (interestingly, that’s my wife’s great grandfather).

We only spoke for about ten minutes, but it didn’t take me long to realize this was one of those neat conversations that God somehow works into the fabric of a busy week. My new friend used to lead worship in pentecostal churches in this area - even the odd event or special gathering. He confessed to me that as a young man he was hopelessly introverted and fearful of large crowds. Despite these thorns in his side, when asked to lead worship he would strive to “live in the victorious” (his words). He looked me straight in the eye and said,

“Leading a congregation in worship was my cross to bear.”

It was all I could do to hold back the tears. It was one of those moments where you honestly think you might be dreaming or part of some Truman Show twisted reality. It was as if God himself had given this old-timer a cue card of things to say to me that would encourage me to keep on going.

I guess at the end of the day it’s just nice knowing you’re not the only socially anxious person in the kingdom of God who has been called to ministry. Honestly, some days it feels like a sick joke. But then other times it feels more like picking up your cross and following Jesus, having left everything else behind. And somehow, that feels a lot more fulfilling and hopeful then a sick joke.

“If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me.” - Jesus (Luke 9:23 NRSV)

did I just name my blog?

hindsight |ˈhīn(d)ˌsīt|

noununderstanding of a situation or event only after it has happened or developed : with hindsight, I should never have named my blog, "hindsight"

Sabbath by Coercion

I wonder if you break a biblical commandment for long enough if God will sometimes just twist your arm into obedience?

Here’s one I’ve been ignoring: “Remember the sabbath day, to keep it holy” (Exodus 20:8 NASB). My theology of sabbath is pretty loose to begin with. I even cut my lawn on Sunday afternoons (much to the chagrin of my Polish Catholic neighbours). Here come the excuses: this semester has been really busy - a full-time course load that has me into Toronto three times a week; part-time office hours at the church; weekly responsibilities on Wednesday evenings and Sunday mornings, the list goes on...

Lord, I just don’t have any time to rest.

Sure, no problem, he says…

Last Thursday night I came down with the flu. It kept me in bed all weekend - couldn’t even lead worship on Sunday morning. And on Monday, just when I was starting to feel better, the fused-disc issues I have in my lower back flared up and I was horizontal for another 24 hours.

Sabbath by coercion.

No, I’m not saying that God caused the flu or the back pain. But I am saying that through those two hiccups in my week, He reminded me of the value of taking it easy, putting your feet up, and allowing time for healing and wellness. After a week of discomfort and heavy painkiller induced mini-highs, I feel rested.

The next two months of this semester are going to be busier than the first, but this time around the busy-ness will be equalized with long pauses in God’s direction.

Congrats Rachel!